Moving forward !!! - ???

My prayer always used to end This way " God I wish to be a.better person, a good one, probably a 25 % of a human being, of how you want to be. As days I spend in this world passes on, I wish to be a better person and in the days of my end, I should be good enough to see you" Well, like most humans, when I give a glance on my past, I grump on my mistakes and sins, a list of things if would have avoided and another list of things I failed to do. Meaningless emotions yet, a self analysis. Leaving the long past, even the present past, though I have become better in issues, which I thrived to be good all my previous days, I see I am still bad, in new ones. Become a little more rigid with ego, a little stubborn and self conscious. Couldn't stop laughing a myself, and my hardwork of erasing my bad habits from my list, the new ones popping up at various dimensions. More prayer and more focus, would be of a much help. I am moving forward, yet a step back and then two steps in the front again a step back and forth. I know I will be good one day,I understand, I have more lessons to learn here. Guidance from Heaven is what helping me everyday, so will it ever be.